WATCH YOUR MOUTH!

When i was a kid watching the National Geographic Channel with my aunt, she used to talk about white people and their over complementing behaviour. 

I didn't get it till few days ago. 

My first dream job was *archeologist*; no wonder i turned to forensics once entering Law school. 

Archeologist on NatGeo used to overdo it i won't lie ! 🤣

Old raggedy anciens debris will be "beautiful treasures", sandy abandonned towns will become "the best places on earth", the most despicable human being become these "amazing characters".

And the list of exaggerations goes on and on. 

The more i grew up, the more i realized that my culture as a black african woman was NOT the mainstream one. 

Being cameroonian and having a huge exposure to western cultures, the young me in my catholic canadian high school knew i need to do something, at least find the truth somewhere....

What is then important ? Beautiful ? Who defines that?

Back to tiktok.

Months ago, when i started scooping my long left music note app, i discovered a conversation enticed by the stitch named "what is considered trashy if you are poor and tacky if you are rich?"

From trifting, dumpster-diving, raisons kids who aren't yours, having a lot of kids, doing drugs, the nomadic lifestyle, marrying your cousin. 

As a kid, coming to Europe constantly, i always wondered why did most western food tastes so blank?

Then i realized something. 

Back in the days, the crown used to season their food. Spices were considered a delicacy reserved for the rich. Then, when they discovered that they were being emulated by poor people, they reverted back to unseasoned food. Spices were no longer in, the market was over saturated. 

Now, since they had the "best pick of food", they "didn't have to cover the taste".🤭

If you have been on the internet these days i'm sure you are very familiar to the "old money aesthetic".

The style comes from european wealthy families. 

If you have been travelling to Europe often, you will see the ostentatious nature of ancient europeans. 

From art to castels, we can all agree on the omnipresence of colors in those areas. Because colors were signe of luxury they used to be the way for rich people to show off; but as soon as poor people decided to join the dance, being classy was suddenly about "discretion".

An African woman ties her baby on her back she's all sort of rural, ghetto and poor... A white suburbian woman does the same, she's ingenious !!!

Black people eat fufu with hands, it's disgusting ; but isn't pizza eaten with bare hands?

I guess you see the pattern...

As i'm entering my 27 year, i can finally say i cracked the code !!! Her it is....

Baby, do what you want to do!

My economics teacher would be so proud of me for remembering this. 

The Maslow pyramide has at it's top *Esteem* and *Self-actualization*

Our unsatiable will for validation and approval manifests it's way differently depending on who we are and where we come from. 

For people with more money the validation comes in the form of feeling superior to the poor, for the latest, it's the need to feel less poor by emulating the rich.

An eternal loophole.

So, be aware of what you say about yourself, the conversation you have concerning your hobbies, the way you describe your family issues, the attributes you share about your culture ; because, growing up is realizing that NOTHING is real, good or bad it depends on the angle !

If the same action is described differently depending on who commits it, the problem is not the action ,the problem is the perceived value of the person in society. 

And i bet you most are not ready for this conversation.

So today i commend you to ENDLESSLY romanticize your life, exaggerate your passions, don't wait for any privilege to live speak highly of yourself ,don't let anybody lowball you. 

And above all, 

WATCH YOUR MOUTH !

X.o.X.o

The French Socialite 🌸